I don’t know. Maybe this occurs to you, too…
You ever watch a film one million instances, perhaps on streaming or perhaps simply on cable some stormy weekend morning, and every thing that occurs, even all the way down to the precise dialogue in locations, however there’s one scene specifically that burrows its manner into your mind and makes somewhat residence there? Like, even when you’re not serious about it actively, it’s nonetheless simply sort of buzzing there within the background, perhaps when you’re driving or grocery procuring or watching one other film solely.
For me, it’s a scene from Bad Boys, a film that got here out nearly 30 years in the past. You guys know Bad Boys. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence play Miami cops who attempt to take down drug sellers and shield a witness performed by Tea Leoni? Will Smith and Martin Lawrence perform a little character swap midway by way of the place Lawrence has to faux to be Smith’s character to maintain up a ruse? Smith’s character is called Mike Lowrey and everybody within the film pronounces it “Mike Lahhhhhrey.” It’s nice. It’ll most likely be on TNT this Saturday. Check it out once more if it’s been some time.
But that’s not the purpose. It’s sort of the purpose. But probably not the purpose. The level is that there’s a scene about midway by way of the film the place they meet with their captain, performed by Joe Pantoliano, the place this complete ruse is laid out, and I can’t cease serious about it. Ever. Here, look…
Just a few issues soar out instantly right here. Joey Pants is:
- Shooting baskets in the midst of the day
- In an unlit and apparently sweltering gymnasium in Miami
- Smoking a cigar
- Throwing up among the worst photographs anybody has ever seen
It fascinates me. I’ve so many questions on it. All the time. And I’ll get to these. But first, take a look at Joey Pants work.
This is simply actually good work right here. Some Grade A police-captaining. He does these things the entire film, too. Just yelling and waving round a cigar and getting annoyed by his free cannon hotshot detectives. The solely little twist is that, as an alternative of doing the factor the place he shouts “YOU’RE OFF THE CASE” and calls for their badges and weapons, he makes them keep on the case. With their badges and weapons. This is a groundbreaking growth in cinema.
He additionally does this, which I’m not going to supply context for in any respect for 2 causes:
- I don’t suppose it wants any
- I simply actually wished to make this subsequent screencap
I stand by it.
Same bullet factors apply to this subsequent one, too.
Hey, did you guys know Bad Boys was initially alleged to star Jon Lovitz and Dana Carvey? Well, now you do! Good luck forgetting that reality!
Anyway, keep in mind the factor I discussed within the introduction about Joey Pants firing up the worst photographs you’ve ever seen in your whole life all all through this scene?
Well, take a look at excellence in cinema…
Just a few notes right here:
- I get mad each time I watch this scene that we by no means get any backstory as to what possessed him to enter an empty sweatbox outdated gymnasium, become exercise garments, gentle up an enormous stogie, and begin launching free throws
- Like, does he do that rather a lot?
- Is this how he unwinds over lunch?
- Do the opposite cops speak about it and chortle?
I’d, no joke, watch a complete spinoff tv sequence about this character that focuses solely on this. I’m very regular.
Hey, right here’s one other helpful screencap.
I’ve mentioned this actual line — or some slight modification of it — out loud perhaps 5000 instances in my life. I exploit it as shorthand with my associates each time I screw one thing up. Like, let’s say I knock over a soda or drop one thing or fumble over my phrases in entrance of somebody. “I used to be, like, getting all of them in earlier than you confirmed up.” It’s enjoyable. It is mindless to anybody who doesn’t perceive the context, however for the those that do, it’s only a super piece of enterprise. And now that you simply perceive the context, I like to recommend you strive slipping it in, too.
Most individuals will take a look at you such as you’ve misplaced your thoughts, however the individuals who get it… buddy, you simply made a buddy for all times.
Oh hey, let’s additionally simply clarify the plot of the complete film in two screencaps whereas we’re at it…
… and toss up one other disastrous sort of push-hook shot that by no means had an opportunity of doing something productive.
Reasonable arguments might be made that that is my favourite character in any film ever made.
We shut out this scene with a “Does it appear like I care?” and a “Whatever it takes” after Smith and Lawrence give him somewhat pushback, which can be only a excellent little bit of film captaining, and one other enjoyable reversal from the chief who will get mad on the cops who play by their very own guidelines however get outcomes, which is all nice. Just a basic Michael Bay scene right here, all bluster and bravado and sweaty dudes working collectively to save lots of the world and/or Miami. And it ends with Will Smith draining a soar shot to drive residence how a lot cooler he’s than his cranky boss. Which is okay. You are welcome to debate that amongst yourselves.
I wish to shut out by specializing in this, although…
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BASKETBALLS?
IS HE SHOOTING ONE AND THEN JUST LEAVING IT ON THE GROUND AND GETTING A NEW ONE?
ARE THESE DISPOSABLE BASKETBALLS?
AND SO ON
The factor I like right here is that there’s no scenario the place this isn’t very humorous. Because, like, on the earth of the film, please think about strolling in in your boss smoking a cigar and launching terrible soar photographs like this on a 1000-degree day in South Florida simply surrounded by basketballs. And even in the true world, I’m having a good time picturing Michael Bay holding a megaphone as much as his face and shouting “I NEED MORE BASKETBALLS. ALL OVER THE FLOOR. JEFF, FIND ME BASKETBALLS.” Poor Jeff.
Anyway, when you’re ever sitting round questioning what I’m as much as, please know that there’s a few 60 to 70 p.c probability I’m serious about this. It’s high-quality.
